Pettitte apologizes

Has not spoken with Clemens since Mitchell Report

TAMPA, Fla. (AP) -- Andy Pettitte had finished 55½ minutes of apologies, explaining why he used human growth hormone and why he said what he did about Roger Clemens.

Derek Jeter walked over, and the captain wrapped his arms around the visibly relieved Pettitte.

Following an offseason of turmoil, Pettitte was welcomed back to the New York Yankees with open arms.

"My boys are hanging out over there," Pettitte said Monday after arriving at his news conference Monday and unexpectedly seeing Jeter, Jorge Posada and Mariano Rivera off to his right, sitting in a row.

Whether Pettitte can repair his relationship with Clemens remains to be seen. They haven't spoken in more than a month, since Pettitte corroborated allegations of drug use against the seven-time Cy Young Award winner.

"Obviously it's put a strain, I think, on our friendship," Pettitte said. "I love him like a brother."

On the day he reported to spring training, Pettitte faced reporters for the first time since the Mitchell Report was released in December and revealed accusations he had used HGH.

"I felt like I need to come out, be forward with this," Pettitte said. "Whatever circumstances or repercussions come with it, I'll take and I'll take like a man and I'll try to do my job."

Other athletes have ducked tough questions about allegations of drug use, using evasions and nonspecific replies. Pettitte admitted his mistakes and several times patiently asked reporters, "Did I answer your question?"

Flanked by manager Joe Girardi and general manager Brian Cashman, Pettitte had a hint of the shadow on his face that he's shown on the mound during so many postseason games. He seemed skittish at the start as he read from notes.

"I want to apologize to the New York Yankees' and to the Houston Astros' organizations and to their fans and to all my teammates and to all of baseball fans for the embarrassment I have caused them," he said. "I also want to tell anyone that is an Andy Pettitte fan I am sorry, especially any kids that might look up to me."

He said he was a "nervous wreck" and "scared to death" before the news conference, held under a tent behind the third-base side of Legends Field. He relaxed after a few minutes and went into far greater detail than most accused athletes have about their transgressions.

"We've been through a lot of tough times in baseball. Why not support him?" Rivera said. "I consider Andy my friend. I'm glad I was there."

Brian McNamee, the former personal trainer to Pettitte and Clemens, said in the Mitchell Report that Pettitte used HGH in 2002 while with the Yankees. Two days after the report was released Dec. 13, Pettitte issued a statement through his agent confirming McNamee's account and saying that was the only time he used HGH.

In a deposition and an affidavit to a congressional committee two weeks ago, Pettitte said he injected himself with HGH for one day in 2004 while with the Astros after obtaining two syringes from his father.

"I am sorry for not telling the whole truth in my original statement," Pettitte said. "I never wanted to bring my dad into a situation like this. This was between me and him, and no one else. I testified about my dad in part because I felt in my heart I had to, but mainly because he urged me to tell the truth, even if it hurt him."

Pettitte said there were no other times he used performance-enhancing drugs.

"That's it. There are no other surprises out there," he said. "That's all there is and anything that would come up would be definitely false allegations."

McNamee said he injected Clemens with steroids and HGH at least 16 times from 1998-01, and all three were among those called before a congressional committee. Pettitte told Congress that Clemens had discussed nearly a decade ago using HGH.

In addition, Pettitte testified McNamee, the former personal trainer for Clemens and Pettitte, had spoken in 2003 or 2004 about steroids use by Clemens.

Clemens claims Pettitte "misremembers."

"I'm just not going to go there," Pettitte said. "I've had to testify under oath. So has Roger. And, you know, I don't think that's anything I need to sit here and try to elaborate on with anyone else."

He "prayed awfully hard" to be dropped from testifying at last Wednesday's hearing. Pettitte was excused from testifying in public alongside Clemens and McNamee, and said he didn't watch the hearing.

Pettitte realizes he may have to testify again, either in Clemens' defamation suit against McNamee or if the Justice Department launches a criminal case against Clemens or McNamee.

"He can't put this behind him because of Roger's selfishness and inability to admit the facts," Richard Emery, one of McNamee's lawyers, said in a telephone interview. "Clemens is putting Andy in the middle of a meatgrinder again. He's going to have to testify again in a deposition, probably this summer, and it's going to be far more extensive than anything Congress did. He is the key witness."

Joe Householder, Clemens' spokesman, declined comment.

Given permission to report four days after other Yankees pitchers, Pettitte threw 35 pitches during a bullpen session at the minor league complex before the news conference. He acknowledged he had considered not playing because of the ongoing situation.

Pettitte plans to apologize to his teammates. He met with George Steinbrenner and the owner's sons, Hank and Hal, before facing reporters.

"I just wanted to tell them face to face that I'm sorry and apologize to him, you know, for the embarrassment that this has brought," Pettitte said. "He was a little stubborn in accepting my apology and said that he's behind me 100 percent, tried to tell me that I haven't brought any embarrassment to the organization. But I disagree with him a little on that."

The 35-year-old lefty with 201 regular-season wins and four World Series championship rings said he did not feel as if his accomplishments were tainted. He said he used HGH only because he felt pressure to pitch while injured because of his multimillion salary and doesn't consider himself a cheater because HGH wasn't banned until 2005.

"I didn't do it to try to get an edge on anyone. I didn't do it to try to get stronger or faster or throw harder," he said. "I did it because I was told that it might be able to help me."

Clemens says Pettitte 'misremembered' him; McNamee grilled

WASHINGTON -- Under oath and sometimes blistering questioning, Roger Clemens stuck to his story Wednesday. So did his chief accuser and former personal trainer, Brian McNamee.

And after a 4½-hour hearing, Congress settled for a draw in the he-said, he-said between the two men over whether the seven-time Cy Young Award winner used performance-enhancing drugs. Ultimately, the matter may be referred to the Justice Department for a resolution -- and, possibly, criminal charges.

"I haven't reached any conclusions at this point," said California Democrat Henry Waxman, chairman of the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee.

But, as ranking Republican Tom Davis of Virginia, put it: "Both can't be telling the truth."

Clemens' reputation and legacy were on the line, and there was the possibility that criminal charges could follow after the seven-time Cy Young Award winner testified.

"I have never taken steroids or HGH," Clemens said under oath, his voice rising. "No matter what we discuss here today, I am never going to have my name restored."

For many, his denials rang hollow.

"It's hard to believe you, sir. I hate to say that," said Rep. Elijah Cummings, a Maryland Democrat. "You're one of my heroes, but it's hard to believe."

McNamee's answers were generally quick and concise. His credibility also came under scrutiny.

"You're here under oath, and yet we have lie after lie after lie after lie," said Rep. Dan Burton, an Indiana Republican.

When it was over, Clemens left the hearing room through a back door. Just before exiting, he paused to shake hands with Davis. Clemens later spoke briefly to reporters, saying: "I'm very thankful and very grateful for this day to come. I'm glad for the opportunity finally. And, you know, I hope I get -- and I know I will have -- the opportunity to come here to Washington again under different terms."

Early in the session, Clemens struggled to find the right words as he denied new accounts new accounts of drug use made against him by former teammate and close friend Andy Pettitte.

Using words like "misremembered" and mispronouncing McNamee's last name, Clemens rambled and stumbled at times.

Roger Clemens was grilled over inconstistencies between his testimony and statements made under oath by his teammate and friend Andy Pettitte.

It seemed clear nearly from the start of the session that the committee would not treat Clemens with kid gloves, despite all the face-to-face sit-downs he did with representatives in recent days -- sometimes posing for photos or signing autographs for staff members.

In fact, after Clemens interrupted Waxman at the end, the chairman pounded the gavel and said: "Excuse me, but this is not your time to argue with me."

When it was over, Clemens avoided reporters by leaving the hearing room through a back door. Just before exiting, he paused to shake hands with Davis.

Exactly two months after the Mitchell report was released, Clemens and McNamee were separated by one seat in the same wood-paneled room where Mark McGwire and Rafael Palmeiro saw their careers tarnished during a hearing in March 2005. In a reference to McGwire's evasions that day, Rep. Mark Souder, R-Ind., admonished Wednesday's witnesses by saying: "It's better not to talk about the past than to lie about the past."

Clemens briefly stared at McNamee, his former employee, during his accuser's opening statement and later pointed several times at his former personal trainer. For the most part, they did not look at each other.

Members of Congress questioned the credibility of both.

Waxman pointed out inconsistencies in Clemens' comments and accused him of possibly attempting to influence statements to the committee by the pitcher's former nanny.

Burton repeatedly read remarks McNamee had made, and each time the former trainer was forced to admit they were untrue.

"This is really disgusting. You're here as a sworn witness. You're here to tell the truth," he said. "I don't know what to believe. I know one thing I don't believe and that's you."

The hearing seemed to split the committee along party lines, with the Democrats reserving their most pointed queries for Clemens, and the Republicans giving McNamee a rougher time. Chris Shays, a Connecticut Republican, likened the hearing to a "Roman Circus" featuring gladiators.

Cummings set the tone within minutes, repeatedly reminding Clemens he was under oath and admonishing the pitcher to "keep your voice up." McNamee also was asked to pull his microphone closer.

Brian McNamee came under intense scrutiny for not being fully forthright with federal agents about the number of injections he gave and the physical evidence in his possession.

The hearing started about an hour after several teams opened spring training. This was far from the sunny settings of Florida and Arizona.

Debbie Clemens, the pitcher's wife, sat behind her husband and listened as Waxman implicated her in HGH use, citing statements by Pettitte. Later, Clemens read a statement from his wife and said she "has been broken up over this."

IRS Special Agent Jeff Novitzky, a key member of the federal prosecution team against Barry Bonds, watched from a second-row seat. Asked why by a reporter, he declined comment.

In addition, ABC News reported that at least six FBI agents were in attendance at the hearing. While the Department of Justice will wait to see if the committee refers the matter for investigation, the agency can also open a probe on its own without a referral.

Bonds, baseball's home run king, was indicted in November on charges of perjury and obstruction of justice stemming from his 2003 testimony to a grand jury in which he denied knowingly using performance-enhancing drugs. Because of his denials under oath, Clemens could be subjected to a similar criminal probe.

Pettitte, who was excused from testifying, said in a statement to the committee that Clemens admitted to him as long as 10 years ago that he used HGH. Waxman read from affidavits by Pettitte and Pettitte's wife, Laura, supporting the accusations.

"Andy Pettitte is my friend. He was my friend before this. He will be my friend after this and again. I think Andy has misheard," Clemens said. "I think he misremembers."

McNamee told former Senate majority leader George Mitchell that he injected Clemens 16 to 21 times with steroids and human growth hormone from 1998-01, and that Pettitte and Chuck Knoblauch used HGH. In his opening statement, McNamee said he might have injected Clemens and Knoblauch more than that.

"I have helped taint our national pastime," McNamee said. "Make no mistake: When I told Sen. Mitchell that I injected Roger Clemens with performance-enhancing drugs, I told the truth."

McNamee was also asked about why he saved what he claims to be physical evidence connecting Clements to steroid use, including bloodied gauze and used medical needles.

In 2005, a source associated with McNamee told ESPN The Magazine's Shaun Assael that McNamee saved a blood sample from Clemens that would show steroid use. The sample was never shown to Assael.

Waxman said McNamee, a former New York City police officer, lied to police seven years ago during an investigation of a possible rape. He also was tough on Clemens.

"We have found conflicts and inconsistencies in Mr. Clemens' account. During his deposition, he made statements that we know are untrue," Waxman said.

In the affidavit, Pettitte said Clemens backtracked when the subject of HGH came up again in conversation in 2005, before the same House committee held the first hearing on steroids in baseball.

Pettitte said in the affidavit that he asked Clemens in 2005 what he would do if asked about performance-enhancing substances. Pettitte said Clemens responded by saying Pettitte misunderstood the previous exchange in 1999 or 2000 and that, in fact, Clemens had been talking about HGH use by his wife in the original conversation.

Clemens read a statement from his wife in which she acknowledged using HGH once, without his knowledge.

"She has been broken up over this for a long time," Clemens said. "She feels like a pawn."